Sunday, June 12, 2011

From the land of the ridiculous and dumberer...the Baby Bullet

Okay, let me first say that I love gadgets and cool appliances. I sometimes get suckered into late night television infomercials and have been known to occasionally whisper to my husband, "Honey...are you awake? Hey. We need one of those...Look at this thing..." So don't hate.

But - I have issues with the Baby Bullet. What does it do that an immersion blender and some recyclable plastic storage containers cannot? Oh wait - I know. They can't SMILE AT YOU. Because the Baby Bullet and its components all have happy faces printed on them, much like the Kool Aid Man. Everyone knows that baby food is just of a higher quality when it was made in an appliance with a face on it, right?

The short commercial also has spokesmothers who are so easily impressed and dull, that they must apparently need the happy face painted onto the belly of the blender, because certainly it's not on there to invite an infant or a toddler to handle a sharply-bladed electrical appliance (at least I'm hoping, anyway, yikes).

Here's what vapid, upspeaking valleygirl spokesmodel #2 (who follows the over-enunciating brunette with the giant teeth) says during the commercial:
"And the best part of it is that you have the little dial...???
And you can...ummm...put the little date on it...???
So........you know when it's good until...."


Yes, she ended her sentence like that, with the word "until" (nice). And for her, the "best part" is not how incredible and efficient the appliance is at making food for her growing infant, but that the containers have the little dates on them. (Did I mention that she sounds like she is on animal tranquilizers?)

The commercial never actually says how much the Baby Bullet costs. It just offers a free 30-day trial. WHAT? As if there weren't enough red flags already hemorrhaging out of this commercial, if this isn't a red flag - well then, I don't know what is.

And now, back to your regularly scheduled programming.